We're going to take a little "detour" during the next few postings. Since many readers are getting ready for, and thinking about, their first year of teaching, I'm going to share a few excerpts from my latest book - Ace Your First Year Teaching - which has recently been released. Even if you haven't gotten that new teaching position yet, I would invite you to download these tips and save them. I think you will find them useful in the very near future.
This week's tip comes from Chapter 4 (Establishing an Invitational Classroom) [p. 49-50]:
Reciprocity
Here’s a question many novice teachers ask, “How should I
deal with the ‘bad’ kids in my class on the first day of school?” My short answer is always, “Just like the
‘good’ kids.” That is to say that if you
believe that respect is an essential element in your classroom, then it
behooves you to demonstrate that respect to each AND EVERY student in the room
- “good students” as well as “bad students.”
Psychologists tell us that, as humans, we have a natural and
normal tendency to want to do something nice for someone who does something
nice to us. If, for example, you give me
a compliment I will want to return the compliment at some later stage in our
relationship. On the other hand, if I
say something nice about you in class, then you will probably be inclined to
share something nice about me in some future conversation. This is what is known as the Law of
Reciprocity. Not only is it the basis
for good classroom management, it is also a fundamental foundation for
engendering respect throughout the classroom.
Think about this: Every time you shout at a student, berate
a student, admonish a student, reprimand a student, glare at a student, or
simply stand with your hands on your hips (behaviors we tend to exhibit with
our “bad students”) you are fracturing a relationship…you are sowing the seeds
of disrespect. The key to good classroom
management is to treat everyone equally, everyone the same. I know it’s a difficult concept given some of
the “bad kids” who may inhabit your classroom, but it’s a necessary one. If you sit a bad student near your desk on
the first day of class or rebuke a bad student and let a good student “slide”
on an issue or classroom rule you have essentially said, “I don’t respect you.”
I know it’s tough and I know it’s challenging, but extending
the same positive behaviors and reactions to ALL students in your room will pay
enormous benefits. Don’t single out the
bad ones - in doing so you are starting off on the wrong foot. You have psychologically segregated your
students into two groups. And when you
have two distinct groups you will always have conflicts and
confrontations. Treat everyone
positively and equally - from Day One - and you will be helping to establish an
arena of respect that can pay scholastic dividends later in the year. You will be building an invitational
classroom.
